Paranoia

Last week really was a whirlwind.

With each day I could feel the tension growing, not knowing who I could trust because of the game. I would hold my backpack close to me, eyes darting all over the place and not talk to anyone who didn't talk to me first. School itself became a scary place. It was almost like putting ourselves inside the mindset of #6. All of a sudden we were in a place where everyone was out to get us and where we had to rely on our own prowess to get us through the day. I remember seeing STACies in the hallway and instead of greeting them I would flash them a dirty look, hold my backpack tighter and run for my life. It was all I could think about, during classes I would plan, during STAC I would plan, at home I would plan, I sometimes didn't sleep because I knew that other STACies knew where I lived.

It's bittersweet that the game is over. I was alive, and still really wanted to win, but at the same time, I'm glad I can go back to enjoying the day with my friends instead of worried they were out to get me.

I guess it all comes down to this: We really all are evil people.

Given the chance to we all betray each other for fame and glory of winning the game and become enveloping in "the kill" to the point where we become a disgusting creature, one that does nothing but feed and rot. People aren't nice by nature but rather they are nice because of it being socially correct. In the end it really is primal, carnal, and evil intent, which is not something we would expect from the teenage mind.

Psychogeography: Behind Closed Doors

Life behind closed doors is something I often examine. Here is a collection of the images I look at on a daily basis, the base of the door, the sliver of light that persists through the cracks, the taste of the outside while still being in. Not necesarily a bad connotation either, but also a good one. A closed door to me can also be a symbol of security, protection and safety. These are all taken from behind the doors, not in front of them, the encased side of the door, focusing on that bit of light, that opening just at the bottom of the door that lets us know that there is something on the other side. People mainly focus on the knobs or designs or even the glass panes in certain ones, but I would rather the bottom of the door.

STAC 2010/2011 (The first full week)

I came into this year quite skeptical about how STAC would turn out, although that's not to say it was without excitement. This year I was not going to be a newbie. I was officially an oldie and that in itself brought a bit a new perspective on the year from the start. When we opened the year up with 'The Prisoner' I was immediately drawn in by what seemed like nothing short of genius.

Immediately I felt like the title was going to give us something in an actual prison or prison camp, but instead, while remaining a 'prisoner' the character is brought into this village with it's own strange ambiance. An independently functioning village run by big brother and guarded by a giant balloon (The Rover). I loved the idea that the show's title created a bait and switch that in itself was not really a bait and switch.

The camera angles were something else that I found to be astonishing. The shots were all meant to create a sense of paranoia and to render the viewer inept of forming full concept of what the village actually is. There is no sense of depth, or distance or even relative conciseness. The camera is frantic in order to not only convey the paranoia of the characters but to create that state within the viewer so that the viewer becomes on par with the character for a new way of relation, yet a reframing and a dissonance because the viewer is indeed what the title suggests, a viewer, a voyeur, the "bad guys" while trying to relate to the "Good Guy" (Number 6).

There's really something to say about that, it feels like some of the stuff we did last year with Brechtian Technique. I feel like I am seeing it more and more in this show. Refreaming things so that the are not actually what we see and feel.

I feel like the camera angles and the shots that were taken are so strong that I would like to use some of the techniques in the next film I make in STAC, maybe even the Be Kind Rewind Protocol movie that it was hinted to that we were going to do.

I really hope this gets down. I'm excited for this year.